Dating Mistake #5 - MOTHERING THE GUY

from "Top 10 Dating Don’ts"
Your Most Important Relationship Questions Answered
By Maureen Salamon, Special to Lifescript
Published February 06, 2011

Mistake #5: Being his “mom”

Those small things we do for our guy – cook dinner, buy him a new tie, drop off his dry-cleaning – can lead to mothering.

That “dooms the relationship, because you’re setting it up in an unbalanced way," Callahan says.

“He’ll always depend on you more than he should,” Lieberman adds.

Some women think their guy’s life is lacking – and swoop in maternally to make things all better, Callahan says. Others may be working out issues from childhood, such as having an absent father, Lieberman adds.

Dating tip: Be affectionate, but stop running his errands and picking his dirty clothes up off the floor. Remember, he’s a grown man and somehow made it this far in life alive and (occasionally) well-dressed.

MY THOUGHTS

what if he really needs help? doing your boyfriend's laundry is too much (my point of view), but picking up his laundry when he's awfully busy seems to be okay. cooking for him once in a while? i don't see anything wrong, especially when he helps out with the dirty dishes. after all, you ask him to drive you around, go shopping (something most men hate) with you, etc.etc.

what's the point? it's supposed to be give and take. nothing overboard. but if you feel like you're a house help already, time to run. and to stop running errands. that's not love. that's abuse.